"Its All Her Fault"

I finally realized that its NOT George Bushes fault. Its also not Barack Obamas fault, in fact it is never the fault of any man. Women are the ones on whom the blame must fall. And as you follow that logic up stream you come to the conclusion that God is a woman, a belief that was popular in the late 1960s....right after he was dead.....must have been a rebirth???

Anyway, two days ago a bunch of us firemen and firewomen were sitting around the station and discussing the problems of the world when Jo Anne commented to her husband, "Dick, your suspenders are in need of adjustment." Dick, silently, adjusted them as best he could and then she said, "You have several GOOD pairs at home, Why dont you wear them?" Of course, that begs the question, "Why do Firemen wear red suspenders?" But thats a long subject that is fraught with pitfalls and arguments, so lets get on with my revelation.

It was then that I had one of my many epiphanies. I know, at 74 years of age I should have already learned just about everything and epiphanies should be behind me, but I am a slow learner. I suddenly realized that I had heard that very phrase before from my wife AND from many other wives. "You have some good ones, why don't you use them.....etc. etc." Women always know the location of and the uses of all our mens "junk".... because thats what it is ....until we need it....according to them....

I commented, "Men would still live in caves, sleeping on a pile of fur pelts, with a good cat and a big dog to keep him company and his clothes would only be enough to keep him warm and cover his genitals. If it were not for women." In fact it is actually women to blame that we men even worry about our genitals being covered, warm would be good enough for most men. I was amazed at the universal positive response I got from BOTH the men and women present. Women ARE responsible for civilization, they agreed. Men would never have come down out of the trees if left to themselves. They had a carefree, happy life swinging from tree top to tree top and eating bananas.

Without civilization there would be no wars so women are to blame for wars and men are dumb enough to fight them on behalf of the woman that wants a new dryer for the garage. For men, hanging the loincloth in a tree will suffice.

So, since its their fault, I think the next best presidential ticket would be Sara and Hillary and you can turn that either way round and I would vote for it. Its their fault so they should manage it. I want to go back to my cave.


Jim Isbell
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